I’ve been doing a lot of reflection on my life lately and I am finding that certain things truly spark my emotions. I know that I talk about food and size quite a bit but that is where my life has led me. I know I am not the only one. So my posts are for those that can relate or have someone in their lives that can relate.
My thoughts right now are about judging people by their size. It really makes me upset. If I were to speak honestly I would say it really p*s#*s me off. Why? Because I have lived through it with people I love and watched them be embarrassed by the stares and judgement.
Visualize this. My Mom, my sister and me on a “girls weekend” to Clearwater Beach, FL. Mom took a plane (and she hated to fly but Kimberly made it fun for her..thanks Kim!) and we spent 3 wonderful days “just the girls”. Mom had cancer. She was on this medication (which I know the name but won’t say because its not the point) which kept her pain to a medium level but the side effects were plentiful. Inclusive of – shortness of breath, weight gain, fatigue, nausea, etc…the list truly goes on.
Mom was not a big woman generally but this medication really did make her gain weight which she was so self aware of. She felt like people judged her and thought that they were saying things about her size. She would say that even though we were on the beach she needed to wear a “moo-moo” over her bathing suit to cover herself up. She felt like people were looking at every meal she ate and everything she put in her mouth because she felt like they thought she was just overeating. She was not.
In fact, Mom ate a lot less than she should have during those days. She kept it “clean and healthy” trying to “beat the cancer”. She would turn down sweets and things that she liked that weren’t really healthy even though she might have wanted them. My entire family knows this but the general public doesn’t…so they judge.
My plea to you is the next time you see someone who is of a “larger than normal” size (or someone who doesn’t fit YOUR mold…and seriously, you might want to re-evaluate yourself because life is not all about YOU)…don’t judge them. They could be going through something you would never want to.
I wish my Mom hadn’t spend the last year of her life on a restrictive diet that the “experts” told her to. I wish she had eaten her strawberry shortcake and ice cream if she wanted it and enjoyed it. It doesn’t matter now as she is in glory. However, it might matter to someone who is on their way there.